Try again!

Growing up, I internalized that you have only one chance to do a thing, and if you failed, that was it. I’m not sure where this mindset started, probably at school when the teacher asked a question, and if your answer was wrong, it was someone else's turn; you failed.

Spilling the milk, falling on a bicycle, forgetting the lyrics to a song, getting rejected by your crush, failing a test, not getting a job, getting fired from a job—all were failures.

As a grown-up, I realized spilling the milk isn't terrible at all. Okay, we have to avoid it, but nothing else happens. Clean it up and try again. Fell off while trying to learn a new sport? Brush it off and try again. It's very hard to change your perception (mindset) of these mistakes and see them as just a learning process, not as a final destination. It's even harder when you try more "important" things, like trying to get a job, getting through the final phases only to get rejected at the last stage, or ending a romantic relationship where you still wanted to be involved. There isn't enough "That's okay, buddy, just try again!" that can lift you from that, and yet, that is exactly what you have to do! After taking some time to process the loss, and probably taking some time for yourself, you can only try again: applying for another job, looking for someone else, or, in less relevant matters, getting more milk.

The one thing to remember is that, for the most part, failures are not final, and you can just try the next day.

This whole week, I missed the train and had to wait 20 minutes for the next one. Today, Friday, I finally pedaled my bike as fast as I could and got to the parking lot at the same time the train was arriving. I locked up the bike, rushed to check in the payment card, ran through the rest of the platform while the door alarms were beeping, and managed to get through the last open door. Finally, I made it on time. I just needed to keep trying.